ANIMORPH ONE MINUTE SHOW WITH DR PHIL
by KityPryde
Summary: Chapter3 is kind of different from the other chapters in length and style but I hope you guys still like it. After the other Chee begin to complain, Mr.King calls Erek and Maria to the underground park so that they can attempt to get along with each other
1. Elfangor and Visser Three

Narrator: Hello and welcome to the Animorph One Minute Show. Today's lesson is on 'saying your sorry.'

**Dr. Phil**: Okay, boys and girls, today we have with us two very special friends, Esplin 9466 and Angry Elfie Shamrock Cearial.

ELFANGOR SIRINUL SHAMTUL: Actually, my name is pronounced Elfangor Sirinul Shamtul, and I am not friends with the abomination.

Dr. Phil: Right. Well, the viewers at home may have trouble with saying your name, so...

VISSER THREE: HA HA HA HA HA! They're gonna call you Elfie! Take that Andalite scuzz! A pathetic name for a pathetic fool! HA HA HA HA!

ELFANGOR: Scuzz? What is that?

VISSER THREE: IT'S WHAT YOU ARE.

ELFANGOR:...ESPLIN is a filthy name for a Yeerk scum!!

VISSER THREE: You wanna say that to my face?

Dr. Phil: Wait! Wait! Stop those hurtful words. You two are tearing your friendship apart!!

ELFANGOR/VISSER THREE: WE ARE NOT friends!!

ELFANGOR: We never were.

Dr. Phil: I see there is a lot of tension between the two of you, but if you would just communicate your feelings...

VISSER THREE: I hate you.

ELFANGOR: I despise you.

VISSER THREE: You make me want to hurl, and I'm not even sure what that means.

ELFANGOR: Likewise.

Dr. Phil: NO! That is not what I meant. Elfangor, you strike me as being the, uh, slightly more rational one, so if you could.

ELFANGOR: Thank you. We Andalites are renown for our rational minds. As well as our ability to think quickly, stay calm under pressure, our generousity, our understanding, and our modesty.

VISSER THREE: Yeah, right. (rolls stalk-eyes)

Dr. Phil: I see. Can you tell me about these, uh... Yeerks.

ELFANGOR: Well, I'd like to, but I learned from Loren that if you can't say anything good, you should refrain from saying anything at all.

Dr. Phil: (eyes widen) What about everything you said earlier?

ELFANGOR:... I...um...I apologize.

Dr. Phil: Excellent! Excellent! You said you were sorry, that is just wonderful Elfangor, I am very proud of you. It takes a strong individual to make the first step to repairing a broken friendship.

ELFANGOR: I did apologize for speaking harshly, but I can never be friends with that abomina-- that person.

Dr. Phil: Why?

ELFANGOR: What do you mean, why?! He morphed into a monster and ate me!!

Dr. Phil: I see. Well, one step at a time, I suppose. Esplin, is there anything you would like to say to Elfangor?

VISSER THREE: NOPE, I THINK I'VE SAID IT ALL. AND IT'S VISSER THREE TO YOU, BECAUSE YOU ARE A PITIFUL, PATHETIC HUMAN. THAT IS WHY WE WILL TAKE OVER YOUR PLANET. IF IT WERE UP TO ME WE WOULD HAVE ALREADY CAPTURED THIS DIMWITTED, SIMPLE MINDED SPECIES. ALL HUMANS ARE WEAK!!

Some guy in the studio audience, "What did he say?"

A lady sitting in the back, "That was uncalled for."

(THE AUDIENCE STARTS MAKING LOUD "BOO" SOUNDS AND GESTURES.)

Random kid sitting front row, "What a jeerk. Let's jump him after the show!!"

everyone: YEAH!! Go Humans!

(STUDIO AUDIENCE RUSHES OUT OF THEIR SEATS AND PELTS VISSER THREE WITH LUCKY CHARMS CERIAL)

VISSER THREE: Ahhhhh! The marshmellows. One alone does nothing, but joined forces with the nutritional pieces of wheat and they are a force to be reconed with. Ahhhh! The irony!

ELFANGOR: Why do you mock me!? Why?!

Dr. Phil: Erm, well, close enough, we're out of time anyways...


	2. Rachel and Marco

ANI-SHOW WITH OPRAH

more randomness

(((Oprah theme music)))

Camera-person pans the camera to include the two teenagers sitting next to Oprah on a plush blue sofa.

Oprah: Hello everyone. On today's show, we have two special teenagers, Marco and Rachel. Now Marco and Rachel are friends, but they admit to almost constant bickering. Now Rachel, why don't you start by telling us what you think the reason is for the fighting between you two.

Marco: Why does she get to go first?!

Rachel: (Grins.) Hah! In your face, Marco... (to Oprah) What I don't like about Marco is that he always whines about everything.

Marco: At least I'm not some adrenaline junkie.

Rachel: (dignified) I. Am. Not. An adrenaline junkie.

Marco: (scoffs) Right. Sure you aren't.

Rachel: I'm not!

Marco: Yeah huh, you are.

Rachel: Prove it!

Marco: (takes out a crumpled polaroid photo from of his pocket and shows it to the camera which zooms in. It reveals a picture of a large grizzly bear with a redtailed hawk perched on its sholder riding a unicycle across a rickety bridge over a lake of lava while juggling bowling balls .)

Rachel: That could be any grizzly bear!

Marco: ...Rachel...

Rachel: ...Well at least I try on missions! At least I have guts. Marco thinks I'm crazy. He thinks I loose control. But the truth is that I am completely cool, calm and collect at all times.

Marco: Yeah, right. What about when you threw Taylor out that window.

Rachel: For the last time! It was a ONE-STORY building. Okay? She's fine, so just let it go!

Marco: (whispers loudly to stage) Here's some advise everyone; Never, EVER tick off Rachel!

Rachel: (growls) Too late.

Marco: See, you DO have anger management problems.

Rachel: I'll show you anger management problems.

Marco: (looks at Oprah expectantly) Did you hear that? She just threatened me!

Oprah: Oh Marco, I'm sure she didn't mean it, right Rachel?

Rachel: (stares at Oprah with a straight face) Well of course I did.

Marco: See?! She even admitted to it!

Oprah: Oh... well... That jacket is just plain adorable Rachel! Where did get it from?

Marco: (Mouth drops)

Rachel: (laughs) Oh, thanks. It's just a little something I found at a semi annual sale at the mall when they marked off all of the prices by at least-

Marco: Oh, sure! Everyone takes Rachel's side because she Xena; Warrior Princess, who also just happens to have a great fashion sense. But what about me?! I'm the voice of reason in the group! What about my feelings?! It's not easy being the incredibly smart and irressitably cute one! No one EVER listens to ME! Wah!!

Rachel: (Bats eyelashes at Marco) I'm sorry. Were you saying something?

Marco: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!! (Cries into Oprah's sofa pillow)

END OF SHOW- AX AND CASSIE WATCHING BACKSTAGE

CASSIE: WOW. Even I have to admit, that was truely pathetic.

AX: (Yes.)

CASSIE: So? What should we do now?

AX: looks hopeful (CINNABON?)

CASSIE: Sounds like a plan. Let's go.


	3. Erek and Maria

(This is my late Happy Late New Years to everyone! Woot! We're gonna pary like its 2009!!!)

Erm, okey. This is sort of an extension of the Animorphs One Minute Show but.... I think it is longer than one minute, lol. Also, it takes place in the Underground park instead of a talk show so it is kind of different in that way too. I don't really know why but I find it kind of hard to write about the Chee even though they're my favorite aliens/androids in the series. Lol, go figure. But basically I just starting writing and this is what I came up with. Hope you enjoy. Oh yeah ONE MORE THING! This chapter is dedicated to **Skyflight Erek's Loyalty** for the Ani-show idea of Maria and Erek. Also to Erek-fans **Purplestar Leader of awesome**, **Riza-San, Mimi-dudette, and of course all my readers and/or reviewers** **Squito, xxtigergirlxx, Kara, BugzAttack, Sarah Mercury, SouthrnBelle, Atlastme, Sparkly Emerald, Mai Enn, jtotheh777, rd2luv, patacrazd7, Sapphirerubys, **and **Lana**. You guys are all awesome! And you all have creative names that are fun to say, LOL. I just had an Ax-moment...

On with the story!

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(Erek walks into the underground park to meet up with Maria and Mr. King/Daniel.)

Erek: (smiles politely and waves) "Hi Daniel!

Daniel: (nods)

Erek: "Hi Maria! I haven't seen you here in kind of a while!"

Maria: "......."

Erek: "Maria?"

Maria: "......."

Erek: "Whoohoo, are you there?"

Maria: "Don't talk to me, Erek."

Erek: "What? Why?"

Maria: "....."

Erek: He looks at the 'old women' incredulously, "How is it even possible that you are already mad at me? I just just got here!"

Maria: "Exactly! We've been waiting on your sorry butt for almost forty minutes now!"

Erek: "Well I'm really sorry. But I had to help the Animorphs with this-" (Catches the sudden look of annoyance that is written all over Maria's holographic face. He pauses in the middle of explaining.) "Um... never mind... so... why are we here anyways?"

Daniel: "Well, basically all the Chee are really really really tired of you two arguing. We were made to be peace loving and gentle but when you two are around each other, all you ever do is disagree, even on the smallest matters. Honestly, don't you think the Pemalites would be a little disappointed in your petty behavior?"

(Erek and Maria look down and away, both slightly ashamed.)

Daniel: "So... I am going to attempt to help you two, uh,... attempt to sort out your problems."

Maria: "Hah! Problems?" (points at Erek dramatically) "That Chee over there is my only problem."

Erek: (glares at Maria) "You know, what did I ever do that was so terrible anyways?"

Maria: (glares back at him.)

**FLASHBACK** (20,000-30,000 years ago, construction site of the Great Pyramids at Giza)

A juvenile boy named Ishaq is whistling a tune as he helps his fellow workers to extract a massive stone from the quarry. The sun had been blazing all day and the poor workers were enjoying the cooling cover of the evening. A woman named Halima stops by with a basket full of water pots. She offers refreshments to all the workers. They all suddenly release their hold on the stone and Ishaq takes the weight easily. He pushes the rest of the stone onto the ledge. Halima raises an eyebrow at him as she hands him his water pot, "Don't overdo it."

All the workers laugh, "Don't you know, Halima? Ishaq is our best lifter!"

"Yeah." Another worker added, "Sometimes I think he could just do all our work for us!" The group of workers starts laughing again. They playfully punch the strong young boy and he pretends to fall to the ground, laughing. Halima clears her throat to catch the boy's attention so she can glare at him. Ishaq just smiles cheekily up at her, "But gee, thanks for your concern, Halima." The woman gives Ishaq a warning stare and walks off.

**Reality**

Erek: "What was so bad about that?"

Maria: "Well, first of all. That was just one of my earliest examples of you being careless around humans and secondly, I'M NOT FINISHED YET!"

**Flashback**

As the visibility approaches close to nothing, one by one the workers say good bye to Ishaq as they start towards their homes for the night. Ishaq is the last one to stop working. Carefully, he climbs out of the quarry and takes a look around. Once sure of his isolation, he sneaks off towards the half-finished structure. He quickly bounds up the steps to the highest point yet and looks over the edge into the hollow pyramid. Ishaq whispers, "If I fell from here, I'd be falling for a long time." He shrugs to himself, "It's a good thing I know which stones not to step on." He opens his clenched fist and reveals to himself two small stones, one clay and the other charcoal. He starts writing on the pyramid wall.

"ISHAQ!!"

"AAH!"

Ishaq drops the small rocks and lifts his hands, "I was only polishing the stone, I swear!"

The lady crosses her arms and says, "Mm hm. I'm sure."

Ishaq turns around, "Oh its only you Halima." He smiles at her despite her obvious frown, and gestures towards the stone wall.

"Care to leave your mark on history?"

"...."

"No?"

"Ishaq! You can't keep slipping up in front of the humans!"

"Slipping up? I did great out there!"

"Exactly! You know what I mean."

Ishaq sighs, "Alright fine. But come on Halima. It's not like they'll ever figure it out."

"Humans aren't ready to know about us Ishaq. I don't think they ever will be..."

"I guess your right." He sighs sadly.

"I am. So don't go around leaving clues about us, okay?"

"Okay." He nods solemnly but looks up at Halima hopefully, "Will you at least look at my drawing?"

Halima sighs, "Oh fine."

She looks at the drawing. She looks at Ishaq. "It's the Pemalite home-world."

He rolls his eyes, "Duh. Look closer."

"Ew, why is the grass red and black?"

"Those were the only colors I had! Would you just appreciate the picture already?"

"Don't get snippy with me Ishaq!"

"Sorry." He mumbled.

In the picture, smiling Pemalites and Chee are playing, dancing, laughing, and joking around in a lush meadow. In the center of the picture a collection of six Chee are holding hands as apart of one of the Pemalite's early traditional and much simpler games, called the "Great Circle Go Around."

"Oh I loved that game!"

Ishaq nodded, "Me too. It was the very first game they taught us." He points at the picture, "See those two Chee standing next to each other? The ones outlined in red?"

Halima nods, "Yeah they look familiar. Who are they?"

Ishaq smiles, "It's you and me!"

"oh...Ishaq that's beautiful. What a sweet thing to do! I'm um... I'm sorry for being angry with you. I suppose I may have.... overreacted.... slightly."

"....Oh that's alright, Halima. You just have to learn to trust me more. I know what I'm doing."

She nods, "Your right, Ishaq." She pauses and adds carefully, "About trusting you more."

They hug and Ishaq looks to his drawing.

"Hey Halima."

"Yes?"

"Could you hand me that stone to your right. I wanna add one more thing."

"Sure thing Ishaq."

She walks a couple of feet to the right, searching the dark stone steps.

"I don't see it."

"You just passed it. It's right there by your feet. Almost. A little to your left and-- WAIT DON'T STEP THERE!"

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"Oh no!" Ishaq covered his face with his hands. "I am so sorry........"

**REALITY**

Erek: (cringes) "I didn't know that was going to happen.... it was totally an accident."

Maria: "I know _that_ was an accident Erek."

Erek: (continues) "It's not like you got hurt. I mean... no damage was done that couldn't be repaired."

Maria: (blazing stare only intensifies.)

**ANOTHER FLASHBACK **(Much, much, much more recent)**  
**

Maria walks into the underground park and sees Erek. With a group of human children and an Andalite!

Maria's holographic jaw dropped.

"So you all pass as humans?" She heard the boy named Marco ask.

Erek nodded. "Yes."

_Well there goes our 30,000 year old secret! Way to go Erek!_

He continued, "We live as humans. We play the role of children and then grow older, and eventually our hologram is allowed to "die" and we start again as children."

Maria fumes, _That fool! I cannot believe him!_

"How long has this been going on?" the girl named Cassie asked.

Erek smiles. "I helped to build the great pyramid."

_What an idiot!  
_

**REALITY**

Maria: "So much for not giving away clues, eh Erek? No damage that can't be repaired, eh Erek??"

Erek: (throws up his hands) "Okay! I'm sorry alright!"

Maria: "I'm not finished yet! Thanks to you five ignorant humans and one very arrogant Andalite know one of the most secretive secrets kept in the history of Earth! There are too stupid, and silly, and stupidly silly to have found out such a great secret."

**Back at Cassie's barn:**

Cassie: (in the middle of bandaging a possibly rabid raccoon, she suddenly looks at Ax) "Hmm. For some odd reason I kind of feel like we should feel insulted..."

Ax: (scarfs down Cinnabon with extra icing and nods in agreement) "I concur."

**Meanwhile:**

Erek: "Gosh, Maria. I don't know how many times you want me to say it, 'I AM SORRY!'"

Maria: (taps her feet) "AND?"

Erek: (sighs) "I'm sorry for everything I've ever done that has made you mad at me. There! Happy now? But you know I do have good intentions for that last one...."

Maria: (glares)

Erek: "Ahh, I can't take it anymore!! Just tell me what I have to do for you to stop looking at me like that!!"

Daniel: (waves his hands dramatically at Erek) "NO! Don't do it Erek! You'll regret it for the rest of forever!"

Maria: (smiles.)

Erek: "???"

**(Next Saturday)**

Erek: "Please don't make me do this Maria! It's cruel and unusual!"

Maria: "Don't be such a baby Erek. And tuck in your shirt and comb your hair for crying out load you look like a hobo. "

Erek: (desperately) "I will do anything! Anything but this! Name something else, anything at all!"

Maria: "So dramatic...."

Erek: "I'll clean out your attic!"

Maria: "No."

Erek: "I'll clean your entire house!"

Maria: "No. Oh and remember to smile and act like a sweet and well behaved young man who loves his grandma."

Erek: (covers his face with his hands and moans due to knowledge of impending misery) "Oh man. I really don't want to do this...."

Maria: "Honestly Erek! You act like someone is about to torture you."

Erek: (through his hands he glances up at the sign, 'Edna's Place: Sewing, Pottery, and Embroidery') "......exactly...."

Maria: (opens the door to the shop.) "Okay were here!

Erek: (deadpan) "Joy."

Maria: (She turns to Erek before entering) "Now I mean it Erek you'd better be nice. After all we're coming here every other Saturday."

Erek: (drops down on his knees and sobs)

Maria: "Oh, stop it. This is a chance for us to spend time with each other and get along!"

Erek: "So why can't we just go to the mall?"

Maria: "Because."

Erek: "Because why?!"

Maria: (ignores question) "C'mon. Get up, let's go inside."

Erek: (Sigh) "As if school isn't boring enough...."

**Walking home** (I'll save you the details of an hour of sweater embroidery, lol, and just let you know that due to a miracle, Erek and Maria actually started to get along)

Erek: "So...with all those flashbacks....what you were trying to say is that you don't like people finding out about the Chee?"

Maria: "Bingo!"

Erek: "Oh..." (Hides America's Got Talent audition tape)

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Lol, okay that's it. It was pretty random I know. :)

In Eygptian, Halima means "gentle" and Ishaq means "laughs." I thought those were two names that a Chee might choose. ^_o


End file.
